john

Wishing there was a "warning" label on the opposite sex is a true waste of time for the initiated.  I'm here where it's all business, or should i say i say...business as usual.  Ever since the tender age of ten I have been very fascinated with the opposite sex.  Not a declaration, but simple fact.  I have been infatuated with the look of them, the smell of them, the way they look and sway, and i have yearned deeply for the attention I had hoped to gain from them.  Apparently I was looking too hard.  What I received in return was nothing like the fairy tale dreams that you see on the screen, or love novel.  I have learned what it's like to be on the losing side of the truth several times.  I am a better man than I give myself credit for.  I have some real positive things going for me.  SERIOUSLY!  Tell myself that sometimes.  I need to make it a mantra to myself and never forget it.  I don't believe in people that run to the arms of another to deal with their feelings. That's what I have gotten for the most part.  An old boyfriend, baby dad, old crush.....whatever.  It is the flavor these days.  The "jump off" life is what it should be called.  Where is the person that holds one person special without having this back up lover in the wait????  It makes me wonder where real character is, or what truth a woman really has to say to me.  Really feeling not worth the reality of real love right now.